As a former neuroscientist and a professional life coach, I have a lot of experience helping people with their problems and learning from them. I’ve been fortunate to go to conferences and meet many interesting people. I’ve been inspired to write a lot of books, and so I thought I would share my ideas.
Dont be afraid to ask questions. People are often reluctant to talk about their problems because they are afraid of being judged and scolded. However, I feel a lot of that is often misplaced. It is important to talk about your problems, but you must also be open and honest about the nature of the problem and what you are doing to fix it.
You need to be open and honest about your problems. If you are hiding them from someone, that is very dangerous. When I was in college, I had a very hard time talking about my problems, because as a rule I would get really angry and tell people that I couldn’t stop the urge to beat my girlfriend and take care of the house and stuff. I ended up taking all my classes in the library, which was a really bad idea.
As an example, there are two types of people in the world: A) people with real problems who are willing to talk to you about them; and B) people whose problems you just cannot relate to. The first group is the people you need to be able to fix your problems with. The second group is people who you just cannot relate to, who you have to deal with anyway.
I have mixed feelings about this whole topic. On the one hand it’s great that people are coming out of their cave and talking about it. But I also think it’s very interesting to see how much knowledge you’ve gained by taking a course or a class on a topic because it’s a very new field and you’ve never had a chance to see what the rest of the world is like.
I think its great that people are talking about this topic, but I also think in many cases its very difficult to relate to people you dont know well. It’s easier to relate to people who have something in common. And one thing that I think people often lack when they learn something is the ability to understand why people are different. In many cases this is very difficult to understand, but in some cases its quite simple. I think this applies to many different topics.
I think it is a bit difficult to relate to people you dont know well, because they won’t understand your point of view, and so you have to try to explain it to them. Its so easy for people to be like, “Oh you’re just like me, I just had this feeling.” But that doesn’t explain everything, and its very easy to forget about the things that your friends and family like about you, or to get mad at people who are different because of their appearance.
The easiest part is getting people to understand/comprehend the stuff you say. I have a friend who has a very hard time understanding how I felt when I was younger. He gets really defensive if he thinks I am trying to be an idiot.
I think idioms should teach you something about yourself, at least when it comes to your facial expression, but even then, I think the best way to understand people is to ask them. Because the most important thing you can do is to be yourself. When someone is talking to you, you should be able to figure out what they are really saying.
If you ask someone, “what would you do if you were in my shoes?” you should be able to figure out the answer. If you can’t, you shouldn’t be talking to them.
